Reflecting

As I reflect back on 2013 all I can remember are the emotions. Panic and shock, disbelief and disappointment, absolute thanksgiving and joy.

I was really looking forward to 2013. The one thing we knew for certain as we rang in New Year's last year was that we'd have a baby. What I didn't realize then is that 2013 would be packed with a whole heck of a lot more. It was New Years Day last year that I decided I wanted to stay home. And I never thought this is how it would all turn out. And I'm thankful that this is how it has turned out. When I think about 2013 my first thought is "what a terrible year!" Yet last year had so much good packaged inside too. New life, new blessings.

As Josh put it in my anniversary card- this has been a year of seconds.

It's like we went back to the fellowship meal line of life and asked the Lord for more. And He provided.

A second child. A second home. A second job. A second chance.

And all this year I think I've made it clear how blessed we feel, but I don't think I made it clear how thankful we were for family during this time.

You know when all is said and done, besides our faith, our family is really all we have. When we are on our death beds, we're not going to want that perfect job or that amazing car. We'll want each other.

I am beyond grateful that my parents rearranged their whole life for us to crash their place for almost five months. They handed over two rooms and a bathroom for us to live in. And I'm sure at times they felt like their home was a storage unit. It was like the world's longest sleepover for Luke. Although most people don't see this as an ideal situation, it worked. And it helped especially since Emberly has taken a while to catch on to this sleeping thing.

Over the past five months we've made some pretty amazing memories. Memories we probably wouldn't have if we hadn't been there. My dad and Luke "goofed" almost every night. They'd go play "robot" or some other boy game which pretty much consisted of Luke jumping on the bed- something his parents would never let him do. He'd shout out of the room "NO GIRLS ALLOWED" when I'd try to peek my head in to catch a glimpse. Mom took him for ice cream some Friday nights. He slept on their floor every Sunday night. And lemme tell you- the boy looked forward to it every night- "wait mommy! Is today Sunday night??" (on a random Thursday or Friday night). He got to explore their backyard and "build a fire" which consisted of collecting every stick on their property and putting it meticulously in a pile. They got to see Emberly grow before their eyes, and I know that even on the nights when she screamed the whole night that they were grateful to be able to walk through that fire with us.

They saw everything unfold before their eyes when it came to the house hunt. They were with us around the dinner table to talk about the events of the day; whether there was new news or not. There were logistics to handle like who would cook, and buy groceries, and we played plenty of washing machine tag. But at the end of the day we worked like well oiled machine. Dinner was on the table most every night. I am going to miss someone always being home. I really only had one day of stay-at-home momness while we were there. My mom was off Sat-Sun, dad off Sun-Mon, mom worked at home Tues, Josh was off Wed-Thurs, and then Friday was my only alone day (the day I declared as Pajama Day). It's going to be weird to actually spend most  of my days alone now. I'm so thankful for that time with my parents and although we don't miss stepping all over each other, I am beyond blessed that they were there for us.

And as we go into a new year I'm going to resolve to not make any resolutions; I figured that way I won't be disappointed if I can't keep them. As hard as last year was, it was the stepping stone for this year; this new chapter in our life!

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